How to Calm an Emotion

Simple Feelings Wheel

How to Use The Feelings Wheel

Step 1 - Pause and check in. Take a few deep breaths and notice any sensations in your body - tight jaw, tired, racing heart, etc.

Step 2 - Start at the center. Look at the faces and choose the one that best fits how you’re feeling.

Step 3 - Work your way outward. Move to the second ring to find the primary emotion of how you’re feeling.

Step 4 - Get specific. Move to the outside ring to identify a more particular emotion.

Step 5 - Reflect. Consider the thought, event, or circumstance that caused this emotion.

My Feelings are information

Your feelings are a special kind of knowledge. The feelings wheel is a tool to help us understand our emotions. We sort them into categories: sad, mad, scared, calm, strong, and happy.

Any feeling can be big - like the volume is turned up. When our emotions are “big” or “loud”, it can set us up to choose actions that we wouldn’t usually choose. We might accidentally break something even with a happy feeling like excited. We might say something unkind with a mad feeling like frustrated.

How can i calm a “big” or “loud” feeling?

Step 1 - Pause. Stop what you’re doing and find a comfy spot. You can sit, stand, or even lie down. If you can be outside, that’s a really good idea.

Step 2 - Put one hand on your belly. This helps you feel your breath moving in and out..

Step 3 - Smell the flower. Breathe in slowly through your nose while you count to 4. Pretend you’re smelling your favorite flower. Feel your belly puff out like a balloon.

Step 4 - Blow out the candle. Breathe out slowly through your mouth while you count to 5. Blow gently, so the flame flickers but doesn’t go out. Feel your belly sink back down.

Step 5 - Do it again. Repeat 3 to 5 times. Go as slowly as you can.

Step 6 - Check in. Ask yourself, “How does my body feel now?” Notice if anything feels a little softer or calmer.

Talk to a Trusted Adult

If you find that your emotions are “big” or “loud” often or you have trouble calming them down, it’s a smart idea to tell an adult you trust about it. They can help you find more ways to understand your feelings and learn how to quiet them.

“Fort Bend Crisis Hotline - 800.633.5686 | Crisis Intervention Team = dial 911 and ask for CIT | Suicide & Crisis Lifeline - call/text 988”